Stupid Television Commercials

Having spent the other day waiting in the Nuclear Cardiology Imaging Department at the John Radcliffe Hospital in Oxford and having to waste several hours between the various procedures, I had to endure daytime television with some really dire television commercials.  Why do the the people who create this stuff treat their viewers and prospective customers,  with such contempt? Some of these commercials are so crass, it makes me really annoyed? What is that Lloyd's bank commercial with all those people following each other like zombies down to a beach with a herd of black horses roaming about? What are all those horses doing in the first place, just galloping along a beach? They look too fit and healthy to be wild, they are all beautifully groomed, with perfectly brushed coats (presumably) so they couldn't be wild. Why the obsession for that crowd of people wanting to follow without any sort of sense, down to a beach? It just makes absolutely no sense.  Are we to see the flock of people, like the horses on the beach, little more than a herd themselves? Is that what we can infer from this commercial? Can the advertising company who came up with this drivel please explain what it's supposed to be? Does it just tell you that customers of Lloyd's are like a load of sheep, who follow something without asking questions? So, if it's a bank, can you trust them with your money, if you are just a person who follows without asking questions, such as what they do with your money, how they invest it, what sort of interest rate you might get for your cash they have in their care? Are they a safe haven for your money? Are they likely to go bust and then expect to be bailed out by the British tax-payer like they did when the crash came, along with the credit crush, whenever it was, back in 2008? I have to ask theses questions, because that's what that ridiculous television commercial suggests to me.

The BBC had a 'sort of' advertisement. I think they'd call it a trailer 'of sorts.' It couldn't be a commercial on a BBC station as they're not supposed to have advertising. It's for Radio 2, the one with the idiotic woman dancing all over the place, on a table, and she ends up on top of a shelf unit. Do they not think it's a bit reckless and dangerous? How about our old friends Health and Safety? Or 'please don't try this at home?' How about the shelf unit collapsing under her, bringing it down on top of her and possibly killing anyone below, particularly children? Crazy, and incredibly annoying. Why do they have to waste licence payer's money on such pointless, mindless stuff? Does Radio 2 need advertising, and particularly in this assanine way?

How about the awful Go Compare commercial where that idiotic opera singer with the twirly moustache keeps popping up a the most inconvenient moments? Who on earth thought it was a good idea to get you to buy your insurance through this company? Well, certainly not me. That crazy singer would make you want to emigrate. Just really annoying.

Why do some commercials which turn up on television on a regular basis have an ability to make you angry and want to throw things at the television set? Those in particular are the one's which insist on shouting at you, such as the Cillit Bang commercial with a stupid man called Barry. I'm not sure if he's actually the inventor of this product (but why have such a stupid name? Why and how, what is the reason for having such a crazy name for it? Why ON EARTH does he need to shout at you? It is actually enough to put you off buying the product, however effective is at doing your cleaning jobs around the house.

Then there's the Safe Style double glazing commercial where a horrible man shouts at you ' It's buy one, get one free, I said, it's buy one get one free.' He pushes over what look like window frames and is quite aggressive. Again, this sort of in-your-face shouting to sell something is more likely to put you off, to be honest. Just horrible. I do note that their more recent commercials are a good deal less aggressive and not so 'in your face.'

I reckon there's far more to these commercials that meets the eye. Why would you deliberately make the commercial for your company so annoying, such as the Go Compare one? It must be the fact that that idiotic opera singer who pops up with monotonous regularity and annoys people does at least stick in your mind. The Compare The Market advert with Alexander the Meerkat (clever that his name sort of rhymes with 'market.') certainly sticks in your mind. Your are meant to get free cinema tickets if you sign up with them and were, at one point, meant to get s free meerkat toy (although we didn't when we signed up to receive Sky television, broadband and telephone, which was somewhat disappointing. Also, playing on the idea that children are intrigued by the fluffy, silly animated characters (the meerkats) which are playing on people's emotions so that you sign up to get a fluffy stuffed toy. Really annoying and not very ethical, but what do companies like this care about ethics?

Annoying Television Commercials

Who loves television commercials? It's annoying that your favourite television show has to be interrupted by these often crass and plain stupid promotions for stuff you probably don't want or need, but, as ITV and other channels depend on them for their finances they're a necessary part of life. Many are fun and quite harmless. They pass before your eyes and after a while you don't really notice them, but others are just plain annoying and irritating. I'll endeavour to give my list of some of the worst. I have to admit that a handful are very good, either because they are amusing, but are well crafted and worth countless viewings. A great many directors begin their careers making television commercials. For example, Ridley Scott, who went on to make films such as 'Blade Runner,' cut his teeth making commercials for Hovis, the one which has the young lad riding a bicycle down a hill (which is supposed to be somewhere in the North of England but was actually shot at Gold Hill in Shaftsbury, Dorset) and the whole used Dvorak's 'New World Symphony' as the background musical score for the advert. Also, many of the Guinness ads, particularly the one with the horses in the surf is quite brilliant and clever. But the rest . . . well, just read on.

Why is the advert for Cillit Bang so incredibly annoying? Who is Barry Scott? Why is he obsessed with this product? Does he do all the cleaning in his home? He is actually played by actor Neil Burgess. Are we expected to believe that he invented this product? Why does he have to shout so much and why does the product have such a stupid name? It does work quite well, but why give it such a silly name. It doesn't make any noise, definitely not bang in any way shape or form. I feel sorry for his wife or partner if he spends all his time shouting to get attention. What kind of life do they have if he can't communicate except by shouting, 'bang, and the dirt is gone!' Does he have an exceptionally clean house? Wouldn't it annoy his partner if he spends so much time cleaning? And shouting all the time? Not a sound basis for a long-term relationship.

Another annoying advert is the one for Go Compare, with that stupid opera singer with the irritating curly moustache who keeps popping up all over the place. Does he not realise that he's annoying and keep out of the way? Perhaps that's why advertising agencies use these characters, we hate them, so we remember them. Wouldn't you want to kick someone up the backside if someone who keeps singing in a crazy operatic style and interrupting people when they least expect it. In the latest advert he's perched on top of an aeroplane. How did he get there and how on earth can he sing with the wind whistling past him? Why doesn't he fall off? Why doesn't health and safety intervene and stop him doing such a dangerous thing? It's so unconvincing and obviously done with green screen. It's about as realistic as fake snow. How do they manage to fly under Tower Bridge without falling off? I know it's just a television ad and not supposed to be 'real.'

The Safe Style adverts for double glazing were fairly annoying. They were led by someone who almost jumped out of the screen and into your living room and was so forceful in his approach to selling you almost felt compelled to make an order, pushing over a load of windows as he shouted at you. 'By one, get one free!' he screamed at you. Enough to make you want to put your boot through the television screen. I notice they've abandoned that style of advertisements and have gone for a far gentler approach for their ads. Did they not realise that it might actually put off customers?

Sofa ads are generally annoying. Why do they always seem to advertise sales that companies such as D.F.S. always seem to have? Do they never sell their sofas at full-price? And why on earth is it so important that if you order it's got to be in time for either Christmas or Easter? I have mentioned this in another post, so perhaps I shouldn't repeat myself. And why do they have people who front these ads with such irritating behaviours? Women with high-pitched voices? Or who jump up and down on the sofas. or fling themselves across them in seductive fashion? Or work in cheap comedy, such as the one for Oak Furniture World or whatever it's called? The one where the two salesmen try to out-do each other and one keeps knocking on the furniture with his knuckles? What's going on there? To make sure we get the message that their furniture is made of solid wood and not plastic? And why use initials for your company? What does D.F.S. or S.C.S. stand for?

Having done a Google search for 'Annoying television commercials,' it's interesting how many of the lists I find have the adverts I list on here, the Cillit Bang and Go Compare and Safe Style one's in particular.